{just enough to make me blush}

Note: I am writing this while waiting at a gate at the Eugene Airport… Thank you, free wifi!

The Misanthrophe’s [that’s MIS-un-thrawp, because yes, I definitely had to look it up] Guide to Life was a birthday present from my old roommate, who has known me for almost six years and lived with me for almost one, so knows me better than anyone ever wants to or indeed should. So while this b-day gift might’ve given my new roommates slight pause, it was no surprise to me, and I immediately bumped it up to the prime spot on my reading list.

This book is the brainchild of the 2birds1blog bloggers, whose snarky tint of comic brilliance I have been known to enjoy in the past (I just audibly snorted in the Eugene airport reading Mole Day!, which my high school chemistry teacher also def celebrated, although with less disasterous/hysterical results). Being self-proclaimed Misanthropes since childhood, they wrote this set of rules for other people chronically annoyed by small talk, phone calls in public places, and other people in general.

I enjoyed it, but then I am a Misanthrope (albeit a mild one—I hope). I also tend toward a sense of humor that verges on the offensive while I’m in the company of others, and wildly crosses that line when I’m alone. Even as I laugh at South Park while home alone eating leftover casserole, a part of me is always wide-eyedly blushing about the fact that other people are seeing this too. An offensive book, on the other hand, is perfect for me, since I like to myopically imagine that no one else in the world has read these words and understood them as I did. Perf.

I liked a lot about this book, but nothing that I feel super comfortable sharing in a public blog, since I do have a v. v. small amount of class. So, as a viable alternative, here is a list of reasons why you should not read this book:

  • You enjoy the company of others.
  • You have a glass-half-full outlook on life.
  • You are made uncomfortable by flippant threats of violence.
  • You are sensitive of hipster racism (and other varieties of hipster prejudice. Which, after rereading that article, includes liberal sexism? I have no clue.).
  • Your extreme PC-ness has choked your laugh-producing vocal cords and you now have no sense of humor.

Note: If any of the above apply to you, you probably aren’t reading this blog in the first place. So no harm done.

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